Title: Mafia Mamma
MPA Rating: R
Director: Catherine Hardwicke
Starring: Toni Collette, Monica Bellucci, Eduardo Scarpetta
Runtime: 1 hr 41 mins

What It Is: Kristin Balbano, her maidan name (Collette) is a pretty ordinary suburban mom. When her grandfather passes away she’s told she needs to visit Italy to take over the family…business. That business is making wine…as a front for many different illegal activities. As she navigates what it is and what it means to run a “family” she is also trying to just enjoy the much needed vacation away. As the businesses…pitfalls begin to make themselves known how will she deal with all these unfamiliar threats.

What We Think: Toni Collette is a very talented actress but no one could’ve made this work. Collette is working hard for her money here. She’s trying to make the very badly written comedy work and it just doesn’t have any merit to it. There is no moment, throughout this absolute slog, in which I laughed. The amount of plot contrivances needed in order for this stupid premise to work is just too much for me or for literally anyone else. If not for the charming turn from Collette there’s a big chance this would’ve failed completely.

Our Grade: D-, Stupid, unfunny and kinda boring this felt like a film devoid of any manner of soul. I cannot recommend this film to anyone and if you see it run the other direction…fast. When comedy is bad, and make no mistake this comedy is bad, when it’s bad it is unbearable. That’s exactly what this proved to me. Quite honestly I watched this to see if it was AS BAD as it’s reputation and I will admit it doesn’t get to those lows. It is nonetheless a rather catastrophic experience. Don’t watch this unless you are truly devoid of brain cells, because if you have them you’ll not want to lose them.