Title: Moonfall
MPAA Rating: PG-13
Director: Roland Emmerich
Starring: Patrick Wilson, Halle Berry, John Bradley
Runtime: 2 hrs 10 mins

What It Is: So something has caused the Earth’s Moon to change orbit. Now the acting director of NASA Jocinda Fowler (Berry) has enlisted an old, disgraced former astronaut Brian Harper (Wilson), and a crackpot conspiracy theorist KC Houseman (Bradley) on a mission to save the Earth and prevent its Moon from destroying all life on our planet. But how EXACTLY does one fix the orbit of a moon when it needs fixing? That’s the question they’ll have to answer. 

What We Think: God do I wish this film were as cut and dry as what I’ve described above. Instead, this is an absolutely stupid mess. The third act is akin to throwing every single science fiction trope at a wall and then making a story out of what fell off. Patrick Wilson does an admirable job of being the center of this thing. But he’s essentially the ringmaster of a three ring circus of crap. As I mentioned previously the third act is so ludicrous and stupid it goes beyond what I think audiences deserve. You all deserve better don’t touch this with a ten foot pole.

Our Grade: D, It tries really hard. It really does. But it is cursed by its own lack of intelligence. Don’t make a mistake not every film has to be high art but it should at the very least make a modicum of sense from a narrative standpoint. No what we’re dealt with is something more akin to losing braincells for over two hours. And why in all things decent is this film over two hours long? Dammit Roland just cut some stuff.