Review: The Bronze

bronze

Title: The Bronze
MPAA Rating: R
Director: Bryan Buckley
Starring: Melissa Rauch, Sebastian Stan, Gary Cole
Runtime: 1 hr 40 mins

What It Is: During the 2004 Olympic games a young and determined young lady from Amherst, Ohio named Hope Ann Greggory (Rauch) took all-around Bronze in gymnastics and stole the nation’s heart. Now over a decade later her star has lost its shimmer following an injury that would seal the end of her Olympic career. Living as a hometown hero and off of her former glory, a series of events looks to break her out of her mundanity.

What We Think: This is as cookie-cutter a film as you’ll see all year. Sure you can tell what’s going to happen as we go through, but is that a bad thing? It can be. What I believe though is that it does not hurt at all if you have a good story to tell. This film doesn’t have that advantage. First of all, it’s protagonist is detestable. Melissa Rauch plays Hope Ann as the worst person you’ll ever meet. Sebastian Stan’s Lance isn’t much better as the perceived villain. Only Thomas Middleditch as Ben is really someone you can even remotely like.

Our Grade: D, Basic, sad, and awful this isn’t as funny a film as I wanted it to be. It’s really hard to waste Gary Cole but somehow they did it here. Rauch and her husband will have to work hard to erase the stench of this one. I don’t recommend anyone see this and with the Olympics going on you’d think this would be proper timing for such a film to thrive. Except it just isn’t good. Perhaps watch the Olympics instead at least they have a Rogue One trailer. Besides that skip this, heck maybe even go learn gymnastics yourself instead I don’t know.

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