FilmSnobReviews

Title: The Boy Next Door
MPAA Rating: R
Director: Rob Cohen
Starring: Jennifer Lopez, Ryan Guzman, Kristin Chenoweth 
Runtime: 1 hr 31 mins

What It Is: Claire Peterson (Lopez) is a divorcee trying to raise her son while also maintaining her career as a high school English teacher. When her elderly neighbor moves in his young, handsome nephew sparks begin to fly between Claire and the younger Noah (Guzman) and when Claire makes the mistake of getting too close to Noah one night an obsession begins that could be potential harmful, and maybe even deadly as Noah begins to stalk Claire making her uncomfortable even in her own home. What steps will Claire take to get rid of the issue of Noah.

What We Think: This film is atrocious. From the nonsensical direction, to the flat performances seeing this is a waste of any monetary compensation you put forth. Leading the charge if awful is Lopez herself who is never, ever at any time interesting nor believable as a teacher. It could be hard to tell with the terrible dialogue that these characters have to recite whether it is the vitriolic crap that was written for them, or if they just genuinely cannot act. Chenoweth brings nothing but annoying with her to this BFF trope. I’m sure she’s charming however it just really isn’t any good.

Our Grade: F, This is a failure of the grandest kind, and a film that does nothing correctly. Cinematography, nope. Direction, what’s that? Acting, not here bro! There’s nothing to see here, and you don’t need to bother seeing this movie either. Save your money and go check out instead the best release of 2015 thus far Kingsman: The Secret Service. I am by no means joking when I say that I hate this movie, and that it truly is the worst film thus far. It takes a lot to top the crap I saw this Valentine’s weekend, and Mr. Grey you know what I am talking about. Yet this film somehow beat it.